Asian Hillbilly Douchebag

In Pineapple Express Seth Rogen talks about the weed dealer that tries to be your friend but at the same time it’s extremely creepy because you don’t want to have a relationship with this person, you just want your weed. This guy down the hall from me is that guy, that weed dealer. Only he doesn’t sell weed, he sells fake Georgia IDs and buys alcohol for the floor. He hangs out in our room, drunk always. He stops by any time of the day and can’t quite get the hint that not many of us like him.

This guy is one of those that thinks he’s a lot cooler than everyone else solely because he buys the rest of us beer and 40’s and used to play lacrosse. Where I’m from, that kind of guy is known as one thing: the douchebag. The douchebag has that inflated amount of self-worth that’s exponentially higher than it should be. It’s so high you just want to bury him up to his ears in sand, hit him with the shovel and tell him to shut the fuck up. Yeah, buy us booze but then leave. Go back to whatever hole you crawled out of and dont come out again until we need you. You’re not our friend; you’re our hookup. Go away, dick!