Twitter Is a Piece of Shit
There seems to be some kind of unspoken tension between Tumblr users and Twitter users. I can’t quite put my finger on it but I understand where the Tumblr users are coming from: Twitter sucks.
I’ve periodically checked people’s Twitters to see what the fuss was about, to see why people used it. Here are five reasons why it sucks:
1. It’s a service based off of Facebook status updates. If you’re one of those people who has to update their status on Facebook every fifteen seconds, Twitter is probably for you. You can have people follow you on a service where the sole means of communication is limited to 140 characters. Sounds fun right? No, no it doesn’t.
2. Twitter goes down every thirty seconds. The servers can’t handle the huge streams of text coming in.
IT Guy 1: Oh my god! That one hundred and twenty-two character post just put our servers over the limit!
IT Guy 2: Shit, what the fuck are we gonna do?! I guess we’ll have to disable Twitter for the next two hours
What kind of service goes public without the funds or ability to sustain itself? Yeah, some venture capital company just invested $15 million in Twitter today but you’ll still be getting the flying whale screen for the rest of forever.
3. I don’t want people knowing where I am at all hours of the day. Let’s say that some ex-girlfriend knows you have a Twitter account and wants to stalk you. All she has to do is get in a car, pull up your page and start driving. Pretty soon you’re at a business lunch or dinner with friends when crazy-ex shows up clawing at your pants, begging for you to take her back. I don’t want you to know where I am right now or whenever. I enjoy my privacy.
4. @Whoever is not a functional means of communication. If I visit your page and see some random post directed at whoever, that means I have some kind of obligation to see what he said so your post makes some kind of sense. Otherwise I’m just sitting there staring at your acceptance to some invitation and I don’t know whether your friend invited you to skydiving, to lunch, or to his mother’s colonoscopy. If you want to talk to someone, IM them. Call them. Text them. Skype them. @Me is probably the last way I’d communicate with anyone, best friend or complete stranger.
5. There’s no way to differentiate one user from another. On any other webservice some kind of creativity is required. Whether you take pictures, play music, make videos or write, everyone else on every other service has a piece of themselves invested in their website. Twitter is just a bunch of boring updates about where you are and what you’re doing. Here’s some news: No one cares!
It’s available on every possible platform from your PC/Mac to your cell phone to your toaster for maximum addictability. Sadly, thousands are addicted to this worthless service that doesn’t do anything new, fun, or exciting. I’ll stick to being creative and actually sharing myself with others instead of updating you on where I’m going to lunch Sunday afternoon.
∞